I would often hum softly while banging my head and would enter a state of calmness only achieved by Zen Buddhist monks and golden retrievers when five people are petting them...
Thank you for explaining your experience of stimming. So many people want individuals to stop stimming, but I feel like if they understood it better then this opinion may change. I think that fidgets becoming readily available has started to normalize stimming to some extent. Did you ever find your stimming to be distracting and competing with learning or working? Did you find you were able to do both? Find balance?
Thank you for sharing all this information about autism and also stimming. I have learned a bit about through a friend of mine working with autistic children. I do understand that you have felt lonliness and different. It is not easy with autism. People misunderstand. The way you describe Golden Retriver is emotional to read. Because I love a Golden Retriver, my sons dog😍
I really enjoyed reading your article. I felt so calm reading it, you write beautifully. I found your line “normality won” so moving and sad and frustrating, I so wish normality could lose.
Thank you so much!!! I would like in the end to take all of the “Pathologically Genuine “ stories and turn them into a book, that would be kind of humorous, genuine memoir that hopefully had good information. Could you imagine yourself being interested in that sort of book?
This fascinated me, Jim. Now that I understand stimming, I think I understand why our Beth Ahabah amazing and gifted teacher/rabbi continuously rubs his beard and & then wipes his finger quickly across his mustache making it seem that he is wiping his nose on his beard. It is a distracting habit of his and I have had the urge to tell him what he’s doing so he will stop it. At times I can’t pay attention to what he’s saying because of this stimming mannerism.
Describing the way it comforts you and calms you perhaps explains why our rabbi has this unconscious gesture. His buoyant, exuberant teaching manner—up and down in his desk chair, pacing around the room, going off topic from the weekly Torah portion when someone asks a question maybe puts him somewhere on the autistic spectrum. Often, we don’t get through a single passage in this 1- hour, weekly class because his digressions consume the time. We don’t mind at all because we are caught up in his enthusiasm and we are learning so much even if it is off-topic. We tease him sometimes, “Rabbi, wow—we managed to get through TWO paragraphs in this week’s Torah portion!”
The rabbi is a completely different person when he is referring to the notes he has when he delivers his
sermon at Shabbat services. Frankly, his sermons are often flat and boring compared to his classroom demeanor. He must have learned (been repeatedly reminded) somewhere along the line to keep his hands firmly on the lectern so that he wouldn’t “stim.”
I will always be more understanding in the future when I notice these repetitive gestures.
Thank you!! Methinks that the Rabbi and I share a lot of traits. I have that same sort of energy in a classroom (and if I didn't have to keep on track, it might take me a whole semester to get through a chapter that really engages me. I try to control my bad habits when doing anything more formal, I don't usually Stim when speaking, but if there is a break in the action, I might. I pretty much stim my way through the high holiday services.
Which reminds me, L'Shana Tova
As always, your comments mean so much to me!!! Thank you!!! xoxo Jim (Adele, Brea and Kira). PS Brea is now doing pet therapy in my class, at a 4-12 school for autistic kids, a community center and residential facility for people with mental health challenges, and at hospice. She is an amazing therapy dog, which means sitting calmly, getting petter, while looking at people in her loving/healing way.
Thanks @jessica Brammer-Owens. If I had found stimming to be distracting to my work or learning, I would have tried to stop. I think there are times I work more hours because of taking the time to stim at my desk and recharge/think. But, my guess is that I needed that time to recharge/think. When I stim in lectures or presentations, it actually helps me stay focused.
But, there is a challenge to your question. I don't have a control to compare against. I don't have a clone of me who is exactly the same, but doesn't stim. Thank goodness :).
In the end, though, I managed to have a pretty successful academic career despite touching my face a lot. And, I know it really helps me. I am also more cognizant now that it might bother other people, so I probably control it a bit until I get to stress or tired.
Another great post Jim! I love your humor as a way to teach. I think lots of people have stimming behaviors, some more obvious than others. It's a great way to calm your mind and only mildly distracting to those around you :)
Thank you for explaining your experience of stimming. So many people want individuals to stop stimming, but I feel like if they understood it better then this opinion may change. I think that fidgets becoming readily available has started to normalize stimming to some extent. Did you ever find your stimming to be distracting and competing with learning or working? Did you find you were able to do both? Find balance?
Thank you for sharing all this information about autism and also stimming. I have learned a bit about through a friend of mine working with autistic children. I do understand that you have felt lonliness and different. It is not easy with autism. People misunderstand. The way you describe Golden Retriver is emotional to read. Because I love a Golden Retriver, my sons dog😍
Golden retrievers are true gifts…
Great article Jim. It sure sheds a lot of light on living life with autism.
Martha, I really, really appreciate your feedback. It helps keep me going :)
Glad to hear it Jim. I will keep helping in any way that I can.
I really enjoyed reading your article. I felt so calm reading it, you write beautifully. I found your line “normality won” so moving and sad and frustrating, I so wish normality could lose.
Thank you so much!!! I would like in the end to take all of the “Pathologically Genuine “ stories and turn them into a book, that would be kind of humorous, genuine memoir that hopefully had good information. Could you imagine yourself being interested in that sort of book?
I think that would be wonderful and many people would be interested.
This fascinated me, Jim. Now that I understand stimming, I think I understand why our Beth Ahabah amazing and gifted teacher/rabbi continuously rubs his beard and & then wipes his finger quickly across his mustache making it seem that he is wiping his nose on his beard. It is a distracting habit of his and I have had the urge to tell him what he’s doing so he will stop it. At times I can’t pay attention to what he’s saying because of this stimming mannerism.
Describing the way it comforts you and calms you perhaps explains why our rabbi has this unconscious gesture. His buoyant, exuberant teaching manner—up and down in his desk chair, pacing around the room, going off topic from the weekly Torah portion when someone asks a question maybe puts him somewhere on the autistic spectrum. Often, we don’t get through a single passage in this 1- hour, weekly class because his digressions consume the time. We don’t mind at all because we are caught up in his enthusiasm and we are learning so much even if it is off-topic. We tease him sometimes, “Rabbi, wow—we managed to get through TWO paragraphs in this week’s Torah portion!”
The rabbi is a completely different person when he is referring to the notes he has when he delivers his
sermon at Shabbat services. Frankly, his sermons are often flat and boring compared to his classroom demeanor. He must have learned (been repeatedly reminded) somewhere along the line to keep his hands firmly on the lectern so that he wouldn’t “stim.”
I will always be more understanding in the future when I notice these repetitive gestures.
Affectionately,
Carole (& Daisy)
Thank you!! Methinks that the Rabbi and I share a lot of traits. I have that same sort of energy in a classroom (and if I didn't have to keep on track, it might take me a whole semester to get through a chapter that really engages me. I try to control my bad habits when doing anything more formal, I don't usually Stim when speaking, but if there is a break in the action, I might. I pretty much stim my way through the high holiday services.
Which reminds me, L'Shana Tova
As always, your comments mean so much to me!!! Thank you!!! xoxo Jim (Adele, Brea and Kira). PS Brea is now doing pet therapy in my class, at a 4-12 school for autistic kids, a community center and residential facility for people with mental health challenges, and at hospice. She is an amazing therapy dog, which means sitting calmly, getting petter, while looking at people in her loving/healing way.
Thanks @jessica Brammer-Owens. If I had found stimming to be distracting to my work or learning, I would have tried to stop. I think there are times I work more hours because of taking the time to stim at my desk and recharge/think. But, my guess is that I needed that time to recharge/think. When I stim in lectures or presentations, it actually helps me stay focused.
But, there is a challenge to your question. I don't have a control to compare against. I don't have a clone of me who is exactly the same, but doesn't stim. Thank goodness :).
In the end, though, I managed to have a pretty successful academic career despite touching my face a lot. And, I know it really helps me. I am also more cognizant now that it might bother other people, so I probably control it a bit until I get to stress or tired.
Another great post Jim! I love your humor as a way to teach. I think lots of people have stimming behaviors, some more obvious than others. It's a great way to calm your mind and only mildly distracting to those around you :)
Thank you again with all of my heart!!